Sunday, April 22, 2012

things, a list:

- the new Chromatics album is kapow!-yum-ilicious. if you need an example, start with the first tune (which some of you may recognize as a Neil Young cover) and go from thurrr.

- since Mar's website isn't letting me comment on posts because it hates me i'm putting this here, hey Mar:

"besides faith in a Creator who seems to bail me out a lot." <-- line of the week #fact.

- the thing that makes me happiest these days is when i get to a pedestrian crossing where i need to cross diagonally. this means no matter which light goes green, i can walk. why it is that this brings me such tremendous happiness is a mystery. but it has something to do with a feeling of fateful invincibility. a conviction that i cannot lose.

- 'i'm sorry if you like the other shoes, but you asked'.
'i did. i'm not sorry.'
'you're not just buying them because i said you should are you?'
'no. i'm buying them because they feel nicest and because they're bright blue. i'm only standing here continuing to discuss it with you because i like speaking with you and i like your eyes.'
' ... what do you like about them?'
'they're cheeky. __i know what you're thinking, they tell me'
'what am i thinking?'
'you're thinking when i take over the world and proclaim national pj day, that i should name it in your honour.'
'exactly.'
'see.'
'come back soon.'
'never soon enough.'

- everyone's been so lovely about giving me sad-music-listening tips. i thought i'd reciprocate, since i think i have the world's greatest armory of chanson trieste (here's a few that come to mind):

don't smoke in bed, nina simone (saddest love song ever made the end)
tijerina, calla
exit music (from a film), radiohead
single (photek remix), everything but the girl
gloomy sunday, billie holiday
ne me quitte pas, edith piaf
slow show, the national
from the rue vilin, max richter
spiders, snakes, a weather
leaving you behind without knowing where to go, herman & kleine 

- i'll be up for work in 3 hours and 12 minutes.

- the other thing that makes me happiest these days is playing with my mom's puppy. i like animals. this is new.  how'd this happen?

- i have serious things on my mind. big things. important things. mostly, i think it's time i resigned myself to certain truths. it maybe was always a question of timing, and it seems the answer is 'now'. and... that is hard. so i work out a lot. i run a lot. i'm in magnificent shape but that just means i have lots on my mind that i'm trying to outrun. the ghosts , the furies. thus far i've managed to keep it all together by gyming my way through it. that and senselessly buying things to distract myself. perhaps it's just time to breathe in the cloud and be done with it.

why does it feel like i'm priming myself up for some newest death?
the (wo)man is perfected.

- i'm not accustomed to receiving poems from people or love-notes or writing. the trend seems to be that i send them. but, today i received something moving. and it moved me , maybe i fell off the chair i don't know. it's hard to remember , hard to translate the heart's seismic shifts and volcanic eruptions into static, black and white words.

I'm thinking about you everytime i'm alone with myself and it makes me feel very happy and very sad at the same time.
[breathless]

- i'm the youngest man i know. i'm soo proud of that. i work hard to keep it that way.

- 'i get like that too sometimes you know'
'no you don't mom.'
'yes i do. i do. i think about you too when i feel it starting. i think, oh, a wave. what would q do'
(i like hearing my mom refer to me as 'q'. she seems to have picked it up)
'what's the answer?'
'what?'
'what would q do?'
'oh, i don't know. __what would you do? i just think about it.'
'what does anyone do really?, what can you do?'
'press on i suppose.'
'i'd say that's about right.'

- here comes tomorrow.
here it comes.

i suppose i should stop putting it off and close my eyes.


1 comment:

Capone: said...

sleep - then wake up - then find your way here.... i need a road trip partner with dance music (that would be you).