post-JD

untitled by swimminginmilk

when it finishes it is a quiet but in a different way.
i sit and wait.
i spend quite some time with letters and envelopes.

___(i'm always very careful before i staple things.
___it's a new superstition: if the staple's messy i won't get the job)

mostly i like to stay in my room. editing things - i've become expert in punctuation -
semicolons receive tremendous care.

someone asks me what i've been doing lately. editing a paper for publication i say.
it sounds so adult , still ,
i'm glad when they don't ask me anything else.

later i send more applications in between tinkering on the piano.
i stare at a book by my bedside table but refuse to read it.
instead i walk laps around my coffee table.

my mom wants to know if i feel relieved or lighter or calm since i've been done?
no i say.
she wants to know why.

i miss being busy. (she nods, 'maybe you're a man afterall')